One man reaching..

So today I am down a total of 50 pounds from the day I arrived home from surgery! It doesn't sound huge to me because In the first month I dropped 34 pounds but then I think about it and I have dropped 16 pounds in the last 17 days so after taking all the info in my brain and processing it I realize that it really is a ton of weight. Keeping the picture in tune and rationalizing how much I am losing is amazing. Now I know many people are reading this and calling me names because of the weight I have lost but remember I was extremely overweight, I qualified for the surgery, I was fat! Also I have worked for 6 months prior to this surgery for my insurance to pay so I could have this TOOL for weight loss. Remember this is a tool and even though I have had this surgery it is very easy to regain the weight if I do not change my lifestyle. Also if I did not make the decision to work my but off to lose the weight I would be losing it much slower. I joined a web forum a while ago and have notice people who were larger then I and have lost their weight much slower then I have. I have read their stories and hear them talk about what food they are eating, the amount of food they are eating and how they are not exercising, That is not how they are going to lose the weight as quickly or reach their lowest possible healthy weight. You can not slack, you have to work very hard to do this. Just know every time I cook dinner for my kids or am around people who are making dinner for family I have to remind myself how damn good I feel and how damn good I will feel in a few more months and in another year.

On another note, I was talking to my neighbor who is having the surgery tomorrow afternoon. I was able to set his mind at ease somewhat and was able to let him know how much his life will change. He is more focused on life after surgery then I was, he knows that his life is going to change. That is a good point of view to have because if you have follow this blog I stated before I was never thinking about life after surgery, I was just wanting to make it through surgery. It made me very stressed and not enjoy the trip to surgery, I was always afraid something was going to happen. I just hope he knows the ride he is in for, because I didn't. I am surprised by the leaps and bounds my life is changing which makes me nervous about the future. I am worried that the leaps are going to get smaller, that I am taking for granted the changes in my life. It is an amazing trip that does so much for you, like a high. The reason I started this blog was so i could go back and remember the changes because I know I am not going to be able to recall the emotions I have during this journey. I do not want to forget the highs and lows. You learn from both.